


Scream

by alumort



Series: Songfics [3]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anbu Hyuuga Neji, Angst, Friends With Benefits, Hokage Shimura Danzou, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:27:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24442819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alumort/pseuds/alumort
Summary: Neji is tasked to murder someone close to him. He can't say no to the Hokage.
Relationships: Hyuuga Neji/Rock Lee
Series: Songfics [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1669960
Kudos: 16





	Scream

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this song: https://youtu.be/FKlGHHhTOsQ  
> (Turn English captions on)  
> I was going to do a second part with the song Deja Vu but I hated how it was going, so no second part. Also I didn't use the full song, just the lyrics I liked.  
> Enjoy.

_< The cold wind blows, I can feel the stares >_

How could the new Hokage be so cruel? Why him, of all people, was chosen for this mission?

... it shouldn't happen. Everything was wrong, Danzo was threatening with death now.Wouldn't it be easier than doing this, though? A wonder that was in his mind, until the Hokage threatened him even more.

The rest of Team Gai, his family. Shikamaru, Shino and Choji, his only friends outside his team... That was the new threat.

_< A trick behind a mask, a ridiculous freak >_

The hawk had to land and destroy the rock, or its whole nest would crumble in the weight of the storm.

_< A random target created from the increased hatred >_

And only because he couldn't use ninjutsu. His hands were shaking, he almost couldn't keep them from throwing the kunai he had hidden in his sleeve. To the ground, buried deep underground; he wanted to fly away, to a new land...

"Neji? What did you wanted to tell me?", his friend wondered, sitting in a fallen log of the forest.

There were trees in all directions, no trace of edifices or people in the range of the Byakugan. Neji inhaled, his porcelain mask hiding his expression. Yet Lee could read him like a book, as he hugged him at noticing the first shake of his body.

"I'm here, Neji. You can talk to me about anything you need to."

His soft, patient smile just made things worse.

_< At the end of the cliff, regret is the only choice that remains >_

His hands were soaked in blood. He had attacked his best friend, leaving him alone when he lost blood with every passing second.  
His hawk mask was loose. He could feel water falling in front of him, yet his feet were in their place with the help of chakra.

He let him go. Nothing would make him forgive himself. Loyalty to Lord Hokage was a default thing to all Anbu members; Neji was one. Yet... his orders were too impulsive and strange.Lee had succeeded in countless of missions, becoming one of the best taijutsu masters of the village. Why had he... just decided to murder him? Why had Danzo ordered him to kill his own teammate? But... Lee was more than that, in the secrecy of the night and hidden from other ninja's stares.

His eyelids felt heavy. His hawk mask fell to the water, slowly following the current just to break under the pressure of the waterfall. Countless of pieces were spread in the ground, the rocks; that was the fate he deserved. He had killed his lover. What was the point of... flying away, without him? Alone, with guilt. 

_< Words like a sharp blade... >_

"When I look at you, all I feel is Disappointment", Neji muttered, yet both of them knew it was a lie. A movement from his hands, and a kunai fell in his back. "And No Zany Out of you."

He bit his lips, closing his eyes. That was some sort of code... that, with the increasing pain, he couldn't decipher. It was strange that he put his Anbu mask on while they were walking in the forest, but... it never occurred to him that this would happen. Maybe it was for a reason. Were they in danger...?

_< Even though they wound me and dig into me, my breath can't stop. >_

Neji never took his mask off. Not while he carried him, hiding him inside the log he was sitting before. There was an eery silence between the two, while Lee had tears in his face and blood quickly left his body. He knew that his friend wouldn't do this out of sudden... but, he did anyways. He stabbed him... and left, a soft sight being the only parting sound that he made. Not unlike the times in which they shared their warmth at night, but this time, it hit Lee differently. _The last farewell_.

_< I can't even tell who this is for._  
_Someone please tell me, tell me >_

The howling winds stopped his fall, a strange force bringing him to the top of the waterfall again. His face, wet with tears, lips shaking as he just... couldn't go on. A blonde and one of his friends were who cursed him with keeping his life. He muttered something, unwilling to look intensely at either of them.

"Just let me die", he said when he felt one of them walking to him, feeling the vibrations of the river. "And I'll be free."

"From what?", Shikamaru asked, his voice serious. He was the one that placed a hand in his shoulder, to push him with his shadow to safety.

"From... _everything_. ANBU. It's... too much". Neji could feel the new tears, the soreness in his throat. He sobbed, cleaning his eyes. "Danzo went too far. I can't... I can't, Shikamaru. I did something horrible, I deserve this."

"No, you don't", the girl interfered. She sounded angry at something, probably at him. Or that was how she always sounded, the boy couldn't tell. "Your Hokage doesn't deserve any you. Shikamaru is here to escape, his team already did."

"Come with us, Neji. You don't have to suffer anymore", the Nara added. "We planned this since Danzo became Hokage. Naruto is helping with shadow clones of everyone, you can still escape."

"I said I don't _deserve_ to live", Neji whispered, finally looking at his friend. "My mission... It was done. _Lee_ , he's..."

He couldn't say it. It hurts, hurts, why wouldn't them let him get away from his cage?

_< Please, I don't want to scream>_

"What...? Are you fucking serious?! We have to find him!", Shikamaru exclaimed, figuring everything out. After all, he was the smartest of the group, he always had been.

"He... he's dead!", Neji forced himself to scream, tears falling again. "I had to do it, or Danzo would kill you, Gai, Tenten... everyone!"

"Neji, if...", Temari kept quiet for an instant, carefully choosing her words. "... if he is dead, we have to bury him properly. If not, we have to save him."

The brown haired boy inhaled, calming himself. He slowly got up, nodding, and ran towards the forest, the other two behind him.

He wasn't far. From the village, yes. From the Valley of the End, no.

_< After everyone departs, I open my eyes again.>_

The sky was dark. And wet. And it had bugs, lots of bugs, crawling in his skin and clothes. Ahh, his back hurt a lot too. Almost forgot that, haha!

He moved his feet, humming a soft melody for himself. Leaves rustled near him, but that was common; he lived near a park. There were trees. Of course he could hear leaves rustling, with the wind.

"Here", the wind whispered near him, with a familiar hum. Ohh, maybe it wasn't wind. Someone entered his department... he knew that voice; the person wasn't bad then.

His roof cracked, the light of the sun blinding him momentarily. A long haired angel came for him, with pretty lavender eyes. Lee smiled at his angel, unable to move much, giggling as they carried him in their arms. Two other angels were near them, and- 

"What're you doing?", Lee muttered as he felt his jumpsuit be removed, leaving his back exposed. "Stop that, pervs..."

They didn't listen. His back hurt, hurt more, then the pain ceased a little. The long haired angel seemed sad, yet they remained indifferent whenever Lee looked at them. 

"Don't cryy, my sweet angel", the boy said, stroking their soft face with a gentle hand. One of the others whispered something about ' _blood loss_ ', but he didn't care. 

Instead of smiling, his angel cried again, holding him close as they started to fly through the forest. Their wings were gone, yet their grace was unmatchable.

_< The disappeared traces... Can't believe me...>_

The heat and sweat was what woke him up. He had sand in his body, in his back, yet he couldn't force himself to clean it. It itched, hurt, but... he didn't move. At least he was in a comfortable bed. It didn't seem like his room, or the hospital of the village, but it was always cold there. Cold, like the forest. Like the kunai in his back that... he stabbed him with. He... why would he do that? With his mask? Weren't they happy together, even if that was a secret between the two?

Why had he tried to kill him? His throat suddenly felt obstructed, the air didn't got to his chest; it was moving, yet he felt like he was dying. He couldn't breathe.

"Lee?", a familiar voice asked. It was soft, light; someone that was his friend, but it wasn't him.

Lee inhaled, finally feeling the air in his lungs. He saw a pink haired girl come closer to him with a relaxed smile; Sakura placed a hand in the bed, near his shoulder, and he frowned. She didn't got closer after that.

"Where are we?", he managed to ask, looking at the walls from where he was. Nobody was there apart of them, but it never hurt to be sure. 

"In Suna", his friend replied. "We... escaped. Neji found you in the forest, like this, before we came here. Do you remember how you ended up... like this?"

Lee bit his bottom lip, his frown starting to make his forehead hurt. He did remember, very clearly, thanks Sakura. Neji didn't find him.   
Neji tried to kill him, with a kunai, embracing him and stabbing his back. Muttering weird stuff, before hiding him inside a trunk. A damned trunk.

"I remember. Neji is a _fucking_ liar, he is the one that tried to murder me."

The pinkette flinched when she heard his words, her eyes showing worry as she looked better at him. Lee didn't say anything else, deep in thought while his friend commented something of his health. Something to do with blood and injured muscles, his shoulder blade was fractured, and that boring stuff she always talked when he was in the hospital. Changing the subject.

He wasn't in the mood to listen. He hated being confined to a room, hated staying in a bed; he could feel his gaze from somewhere, a hawk waiting for its prey to escape its shelter. Now that they were in an unknown place, he wouldn't be able to hide from him when he got out. He wouldn't be able to escape.

Why did he let him live? The times in which they slept together were forgotten, yet he was alive, yet Neji hadn't finished what he started. It was weird, to be this angry. Lee loved that brunet, always had. Now, all he felt towards the man was hate and disgust.

_< Forget everything you've seen, believe that nothing ever happened>_

"I'm sorry."

Neji had his gaze in the ground, his hands holding a bouquet of flowers. His long hair covered his eyes and, for once, Lee felt scared of brushing it. Of touching him again, like before they moved deep into the desert. His hands would've caressed his face already, alone as they were in the middle of the night. The black haired man frowned, not moving to receive him.

He... _attacked_ him. Lee was still unsure if this was an afterlife dream or if he _was_ saved by Suna, if this was the reality and they _did_ escape Konoha. The Hokage. The village that used to be their home before Tsunade and Kakashi died- no, they were _killed_ , they didn't die out of sudden.

His teammate had... stabbed him. With a hawk mask covering his tears, his indifference; maybe he even felt joy, getting rid of a ninja that couldn't do more than taijutsu. Maybe Lee deserved death. He wasn't smart, or talented, and his voice was too loud to help his friends in finding comfort.

"... you don't need to forgive me. I wouldn't be mad at you for that", his former lover whispered, extending his arms to give him the flowers. Lee couldn't force himself to not flinch, to not close his eyes in the expectancy of another strike.

He heard Neji sigh, and leave something in the ground. He heard his feet moving away in a slow motion, turning some meters away to see if he would follow him.

Lee did not. He didn't pick the flowers he left, in fear Tenten would've sealed weapons on their borders; she was skilled and always on his side, who can say she wouldn't help him with something as easy as that? She liked him too; who's to say she didn't want to impress him with finishing his plan?

When the sun came back, the bouquet was still in front of the door, in the sand. They had started to wither with the heat of the day, of the desert, yet... he couldn't force himself to pick them up. The morning wind blew them away, dried petals flying through the village as Lee dodged it, dodged him. He visited Ino and Sakura, something that he had to do or Temari wouldn't allow him to get missions.

They said something about a trauma, but he didn't care. He just wanted his therapy to be over, that the hawk stopped flying near him. Why was he so insistent, if he had tried to murder him, was a mystery that he couldn't understand.

Another thing he couldn't understand was the strange chant he said before the attack. What was all that nonsense? Why the fuck did he act so _gloomy_ and _soft_ now, when he had broken one of his bones before leaving him to die of blood loss about two weeks ago?

... Lee had to focus to breathe, as his chest wasn't moving. It was tight, his throat ached; he managed to do so, continuing his path in silence and alert, suspecting of every corner. Neji was a trained assassin, and he couldn't underestimate him.

**Author's Note:**

> The code Neji said uses the capitalized letters. You probably guessed, but I want to make it clear here.  
> Tell me what you thought of the fic :D I love seeing comments.


End file.
